When everything inside me looks like everything I hate, you are hope I have for change. You are the only chance I'll take. I'm on fire when you're near me. I'm on fire when you speak. I'm on fire burning at these mysteries. (Switchfoot)Patrick and I have been watching a lot of NatGeo TV lately. And the more I watch these shows about taboos and people (especially in the eastern world- last night we watched 'China's Elephant Man') facing adversity, the more I start to despise the western world and the culture we live in.
Let's talk about my everyday life. I work in Del Mar, a community in San Diego known for it's geographic beauty (hello, ocean!), and notorious for the wealthiest of wealthy living. The cars you see driving around here are top of the line, and the lower end BMWs and Mercedes are really more like the Toyota Camries of the community. Typical Del Mar moms weigh in at about 100 lbs a pop, most of that weight coming from their boob jobs! So, needless to say, I see and experience vanity everyday, even in my own workplace!
It's unfortunate that I know women who literally only will associate with you if you have any hint of wealth. Otherwise, you aren't worth their time. They thrive off leasing luxury cars in an effort to appear of a higher social class and name-dropping clothing brands as if they know of nothing else in the world. I know men who won't even glance your way if you appear to weigh more than 110 lbs. I know men who ignore you completely if you refuse to bat your eyelashes and give them the goo-goo, ga-ga attention they crave. I also know women who publicly weep at the very thought of having to get dental work done, for fear that their social lives and prospects of sexual partners might be inhibited throughout the process. Say what?!
Remember folks, there are gazillions of people on this planet, and I many of them are much, much worse off. Now, in the interest of keeping things 'light' and 'happy' in my work environment (I mean, hell, there are less than 20 people that work here), I don't actually call these people out. But in my mind I am always screaming at these people! There are people who don't have teeth, or dental care! There are people out there who are shunned by society because they have tumors on their faces or leprosy or other medical conditions they can't receive care for! There are people who have never owned a car!
I'm amazed at how much ignorance there is in our society. I certainly won't say that I am never vain, that I never forget how lucky I am, that I never get caught up in this posh lifestyle. But the awareness is there, in my gut, and I hope that never leaves.
